A river that also flowed
We both came in from the same place,
Somewhere high up in the mountains,
Where all you find is ice and snow,
And nothing to obstruct your flow.
We flowed by the rocks,
Hitting them left, right and center,
Deep ravines and shallow river beds,
Were all our doing, remember.
Such a good time we had,
Flowing in swift rapids,
Taking whatever came in our path,
Didn’t matter if it wasn’t ours.
Then one fine day,
A huge cliff stared at us in the face,
We could choose either right or left,
But sadly, not both of them.
I wanted the right,
You adamantly wanted the left,
None of us would budge,
And the cliff split us through.
I could see you for a while,
Your splendid white water,
Glistening in the morning sun,
Deep cliffs adorning your sides.
My path was a bit less exciting,
Less of turns and more of falls,
Some say waterfalls look magnificent,
That’s beacuse they haven’t fallen off one.
Soon I lost sight of you,
And you of me,
I miss the camaraderie we shared,
Hope you missed it too.
I came down to the plains,
And all activity ceased,
I was reduced to a lazy flow,
And gentle turns once in a while.
People poured their shit on me,
Washed their clothes in my pure veins,
And then made a brouhaha of,
Trying to supposedly clean me up.
Then one day I met a river,
Who looked different yet familiar,
And lo and behold,
It was you!!
You were still as magnificent as before,
Your gait had assumed more importance,
You were also supposedly holier,
Than the water carried by me.
Why is it that even though we were,
Brothers in arms once upon a time,
You took all the right choices,
While mine seemingly didn’t work out?
What is it,
That separates me from you,
Our waters were the same when we started,
And we’ll all end up in an ocean one day.
Fame has taken a heavy toll on you,
You don’t talk as much as you used to,
Maybe one day we should sit,
And catch up on lost time.
Or maybe we should leave our past behind,
And just move on,
And not wonder,
Why they say you were the better river after all.
July 15, 2009 at 12:02 pm
totally spellbound
July 17, 2009 at 6:27 am
Brilliant concept! Very well written!
A few pointers from my side – (these are just personal views…)
1. I came down to the plains,
And all activity ceased – i think the word activity is taking the beauty away from the phrase…how bout replacing it with a word like ‘brio’ or ‘spright’?
2. The poem seems to deviate from its meter at times. Its fine if thats deliberate.
3. Why is it that even though we were,
Brothers in arms once upon a time, – i think rivers are feminine….pls check on that..
July 18, 2009 at 9:41 pm
Fantabulous!!
I din’t know that you had such hidden talents. Keep writing!!
August 8, 2009 at 11:36 pm
I must say the metaphorical expression was nothing short of splendid!